Dear doctor,
I need your expert advice. As my wedding approaches, I've realized that I am involuntarily a virgin, and every attempt at penetration has been impossible. I wonder if this is an anatomical problem, but my periods are normal, and looking in the mirror, I see that the opening appears to be of sufficient size. However, this situation greatly concerns me as I fear disappointing my future husband and not being able to conceive children. Could you shed light on what might be causing this issue and help me find solutions so that we can envision our future with peace of mind? Thank you immensely for your invaluable help.
Florence* 25 years old *name anonymized
Dear Florence,
Thank you for sharing your concerns with me, and I understand how troubling this situation can be for you as your wedding approaches. Based on the description you've provided, it is indeed possible that you are experiencing vaginismus, a condition where the muscles of the vagina involuntarily contract during attempts at penetration.
Here are some key points to better understand this condition and explore treatment possibilities:
Vaginismus Explained
Vaginismus can be caused by various factors, such as anxiety, fear of pain, traumatic sexual experiences, or even apprehension related to penetration. It's important to remember that it's not your fault, and this is a medical issue that can be successfully treated.
Diagnosis and Consultation
A thorough medical consultation is crucial to confirm the diagnosis of vaginismus and rule out any other underlying conditions. During this consultation, we will discuss your medical history, sexual background, and perform a physical examination to better understand the situation.
Possible Treatments
Fortunately, there are different approaches to treat vaginismus. Sexual therapy and psychotherapy are often recommended to address any psychological causes. Relaxation and breathing exercises can also help to ease pelvic muscle tension.
Kegel Exercises
Kegel exercises, involving contracting and relaxing pelvic muscles, are beneficial for strengthening these muscles and may improve the condition.
Use of Vaginal Dilators
Vaginal dilators are conical and progressive devices that aid in getting accustomed to penetration. We can provide you with information on their usage and guide you through the process.
Partner Involvement
Open communication with your future husband is essential. Their understanding and loving support can play a crucial role in the success of the treatment.
At the end of this post, you will find a downloadable PDF with exercises to help you progress towards a fulfilling intimate life.
Please know that you are not alone in this journey, and I am here to support you throughout the treatment process. Feel free to ask any questions you may have, and together, we will work to overcome vaginismus, so you can look forward to your future with peace of mind.
Best regards,
Dr. Sandra Yene Amougui
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